Attempting Our New Practice of Agility
As we write this, we stare down the beginning of Week 7 of Quarantine here in the U.S. We’ve cooked 6 loaves of sourdough bread, read a bit, cried some, and ridden the waves of different emotions. We have felt hope, anger, fear, contentment, confusion, optimism, exhaustion. Sometimes, quite literally, we have felt all these emotions in the same hour. A new routine has settled in with how we grocery shop, how we take care of our homes, selves, and families - and yet, each day brings a new set of challenges and hurdles in which to adapt. There is no precedent for this, no road map, no expected arc and rhythm like we see with other natural disasters, for example. Most days we are kind of just winging it.
In speaking with a friend this past week, she told me she had created a newly adapted routine and was disappointed that it wasn’t working for her and her family that day. As we talked, we mused that each day is requiring something new of us. We’re in constant adaptation mode. And good Lord, it’s exhausting and frustrating.
How do we adapt to this very rapid change in our routines, social interactions, and circumstances? We wish we had the exact answer, but we’re sharing some tips below that are helping us through it:
Stop Comparing. There is not one of us who is experiencing social distancing the same. A routine that works for one individual, family or organization does not work for another. You don’t have to be practicing daily yoga or learning how to paint (though if that's your jam, by all means go ahead!). But in many cases, you may literally be figuring out how to pay rent and put food on the table this month, or to keep your business afloat and employees receiving paychecks. Stop comparing your journey to someone else’s. You’re doing the best you can with the info you have and YOUR circumstances.
Let go. This has admittedly taken us a while. It echoed the stages of grief, and that messy, non-linear nature of the grief cycle. We have had moments of anger, some of denial, and more recently leaning into acceptance and letting go. Be gentle - that may be a long and bumpy path, especially if routines were well oiled and strongly held customs are being disrupted.
Stay curious. What is possible? Rather than trying to retrofit our routines from February into May, what can we create anew with our current circumstances? What is this new information requiring of us now? How will we be different as a result of this? What new future might be possible that we didn’t think of before?
We are giving ourselves permission to work through the tips above and feel it all. And yep, it’s messy. So we’re also leaning on self-compassion an allowing us to try it out, fail, fall down, and rise again. Those are the hallmarks of adaptive, brave, and resilient communities and leaders. It’s hard, but that’s who we want to be - at least this hour.
