Two Questions to Manage Self-Criticism
In our very VUCA world (Volatile, Uncertain, Complex, and Ambiguous), it’s no surprise that anxious thoughts arise with great leadership.* Post-pandemic pressures, stakeholder expectations, staff leadership, and results delivery are ever present, competing for our attention. These require dexterity and bravery for attempting to smoothly sail through new waters, often with little precedent. And this doesn’t even touch upon integrating home demands, vacation, finances, etc.
No wonder we have anxious thoughts and are self-critical!
So how do we manage those thoughts rather than have them manage us?
Be your own investigative scientist. What are the cues that anxiety and self-criticism are creeping in? How do we know when these visitors have entered the chat? For some people, it's rumination. For others, it’s a flutter in the chest or sweaty palms.
Focus on moving through the emotion - breathing exercises, a walk in nature, play, lunch with a friend. This helps activate our calm, rational, executive thinking brain. It moves us out of fight or flight.
Doing so allows us to ask these 2 questions when those moments arise, as suggested by Emma Seppala, Professor at Yale School of Management:
- What do I need right now?
- What are these thoughts/anxiety telling me?
Explore possibilities for addressing the needs, wants, or intelligence that is gleaned from this contemplation.
Next time anxious chatter enters your leadership practice, consider the above. What might you need and what wisdom does this emotion have for you?
*Long-term and/or frequent anxiety may indicate a need for a qualified mental health professional. Please reach out to a qualified mental health professional for anxiety-related mental health concerns.
